From the Pitcher's Mound
by Luvtowritefics247
Summary: Deleted Scenes of varying ratings from my story Dropped the Ball.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from **PG-R**. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Down the Middle

**Timeline**: Takes place between 8 and 9 weeks pregnant.

**Rating**: PG-13

**Summary**: Educating Arnold on high school life.

**Word Count**: 549

* * *

"Okay, _explain_ to me again exactly _why_ it doesn't bother you that those cheerleaders keep referring to you as a _whale_?"

Helga sighed loudly as she dropped her backpack on the floor, "They don't call me a whale, _Hair_ _Boy_. They call me the 'cautionary whale.' _Doi_! Get it right," she huffed as she laid out on the bed.

Arnold offered and eye roll of his own as he place his bag by the desk, "Oh, _excuse_ me."

"_Hey_, watch the **attitude** Football Head."

"Well, _sor-ry_ Helga, but it's a little hard for me to figure out _why_ it doesn't bother you. I mean, you almost seem to get a kick out of it!"

"It probably seems that way, because I _do_, Arnold-o!"

"But _why_? What they're saying is really mean. And you don't _look_ like a whale anyway," Arnold stated as he crossed his arms.

"Not yet, I don't."

"_Helga_."

"Well, _what_ Jungle Boy? Its just a **stupid** movie reference! Its not like those _bimbos_ could come up with something so witty on their own."

"So, its all some big joke from some movie?"

"_Doi_."

"Is making lame movie references _all_ high school kids **do** anymore?"

Helga snorted, "Basically. But, 'Juno' isn't lame-it's pretty funny and about the closest thing we've got to relate to."

"If they go around teasing a pregnant teen, I'm not all that interested in seeing anymore of that," Arnold deadpanned as he went about getting his books.

For a moment, Helga sat up and considered him before getting a wicked gleam in her eyes, "Hold on a minute, Football Head. I got an idea."

"Is it anything like the time you thought it'd be a good idea to sleep together while we were clearly drunk? Cause if so, I ask you give it a second thought," Arnold quipped.

The blonde scowled, "_No_, its _not_ Mr. _Smart_ _Ass_. But, _now_ I'm not going to **give** you a choice in whether you want to participate or _not_."

Arnold gave her his slanted look, "What is it, Helga?"

She smirked, "_I'm_ going to educate you on both the stereotypical portrayal of high school drama with scarily realistic undertones **and** on becoming part of the teen pregnancy statistic."

Arnold looked at her blankly, "And you plan to do that by…?"

"Watching a Double Feature," she replied with an evil grin.

* * *

Hours later, Arnold sat motionless on the bed as credits rolled, "Those were probably the most awful movies I have ever seen."

"Bite your tongue, Football Head! Those movies are true gems."

Arnold raised an eyebrow at her, "'Mean Girls' is probably the _worst_ movie in existence."

Helga feigned shock, "How _dare_ you!"

"And 'Juno' probably wouldn't have been so bad if the situation wasn't so relatable I guess. And wasn't viewed with 'Mean Girls'."

"But, don't you feel a little _bit_ more understanding towards how high school works in accordance to our situation?"

Arnold shot her a look as he got up, "Helga, I can promise you, I didn't need to see these movies to get what they were saying. I've been seeing these on repeat pretty much everyday at school."

"Well," Helga started, "At least _now_ you can get all the jokes."

"Helga, let's leave the 'looking on the bright side' stuff to me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it. In this case, that also includes Runaway Bride.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from **PG-R.** The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Fall Classic

**Timeline:** October 7th

**Rating:** **PG**

**Summary:** Realized I completely forgot about Arnold's birthday. Whoopsie! So, here ya go. _Drabble_.

**Word Count:** 432

* * *

"Hey Arnold! Your little friend who used to have one eyebrow, but now is carrying your unborn child, is here!" Phil announced loudly.

Arnold came in from the kitchen shaking his head and casting a frown towards his grandpa, "You know, you'd save a _lot_ more precious breath by just saying 'Helga is here,' Old Man."

"What's _this_?" Phil cawed indignantly, "Old enough to see R-rated movies, and that means you can talk smack to your frail ol' grandpa? Is _that_ what this world is _coming_ to?"

Arnold rolled his eyes as his grandpa continued his mock rant back into the kitchen, before turning his attention to the blonde in the doorway. Helga's eyebrow was raised in a silent question, and Arnold rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "_Uh_, hey Helga. How's it going?" Suddenly, it occurred to him the something could be wrong and he rushed to her, "Are you alright? Is everything okay with the baby?"

Helga snorted, "_Yeah_, because I'd take a _bus_ here on the way to the hospital to tell you that," she looked away with a scowl, though the pink staining her cheeks were evident as she shoved the plastic bag she was carrying into Arnold's chest, "_Here_."

Arnold peered down at the bag and then back up at her, "What is…?"

"Happy Birthday, Football Head."

Arnold's eyes widened a little as he reached into the bag and pulled out the thin album, "Wait…no _way_!" He looked at Helga with shock, "This is _Dino Spumoni's_ very first record! No, no this is worth a fortune, I can't take this-"

"Ah, sure ya can Hair Boy!" Helga shrugged off stiffly, "God even knows **why** you like that stuff so much, but to each his own and all that."

Arnold, still recovering from the surprise, managed to blurt out, "Where did you even _find_ this? It looks like its in almost perfect condition."

Helga lifted a shoulder in nonchalance, "_Eh_, I found it in Olga's storage unit. She wanted to go through and get rid of some stuff. You won't _believe_ the sort of crap she has collected over the years from various admirers! _Anyway_, I saw this; knew you liked it; so, yeah enjoy."

"But-"

"I said _enjoy_."

Arnold sighed before offering a warm smile, "Okay, okay I give. Thank you Helga, I really appreciate this. This is a really thoughtful gift."

Helga crossed her arms, "Yeah, yeah don't get _sappy_ on me, Football Head. Its just a gift. Besides, it's the _least_ I could do; you **are** the father of my unborn child after all."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it. In this case, Whinnie the Pooh or Indiana Jones.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from **PG-R**. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter** **Title:** Shake-Off

**Timeline:**Halloween

**Rating:****PG-13**

**Summary:**Helga's creative costume ideas ensue.

**Word Count:** 449

* * *

"I'm _sorry_, but you actually want to _go_ to Rhonda's Halloween party?"

Arnold shrugged, "Well, why not?"

Helga scoffed, "Don't you remember what **happened** last time you went to one of her parties?"

Arnold flushed as he sent her a slanted look, "I think I can refrain from knocking you up _again_, Helga."

Helga's own cheeks went red as she placed her hands defiantly on her hips, "_Gee_, I sure hope our baby gets _your_ sense of humor."

Arnold rolled his eyes, "What's the big deal Helga? Look, I _doubt_ we'll have this same kind of freedom next year to just go out when we want. So, why waste this year? Besides, it'll be fun!"

"Oh, yeah…_right_," Helga pretended to ponder, "Hmm, now _what_ could I _possibly_ go as? _Ooh_, I know! A _nun_!"

Arnold cast her a lidded, un-amused glance, "Helga…"

"Oh wait! See, if I go down the 'cutesy' route, I could be Kanga…and my belly could be _Roo_," Helga mock cooed as she placed her palms to her belly.

Arnold crossed his arms, "Cute."

"Isn't it _just_?" Helga gushed, "Ah ha! I've **got** it! I could just be a giant plus sign," She held her arms perpendicular to her body, "I'll just walk around like this all night."

Arnold looked on straight-faced, "Seriously?"

"Or, we could go the theme route," Helga chirped, "Since you're going as Indiana Jones, I could be the _boulder_."

"You're _so_ obnoxious, it's not even _funny_!" Arnold exclaimed, though Helga was unfazed by the outburst.

"_Hey_, I'm at the butt of everyone's jokes these days! Nothing I do will get me out of it. And dressing up is stupid! What other options do I have this close to Halloween anyway? You're costume is your dad's stuff! I might as well cut _eye_ _holes_ in a white bed sheet and call myself 'The Ghost of Carefree Teenage Life's Past'!"

Arnold merely scowled, but a moment later inspiration struck, "I've got a _better_ idea. You want to pun the heck out of your situation on a budget? Done. _And_, it won't even be a joke about your non-existent baby bump."

"Oh _yeah_? I'm all ears, _Indy_."

* * *

Gerald, dressed as Puff Daddy, looked on in a mixture of confusion and zero amusement, "What the heck are you supposed to be, Pataki? A gift?" He snorts, "Yeah _right_."

Helga scowled, "No, _Gerald-o_," she gestured to the pink, footie-pajamas with the big red bow across her belly, "I'm a _present_ _box_. The **baby** is the gift."

"_Oh_," Gerald sneered, "_Oh_, that is just _cheesy_."

Arnold smirked and tipped his fedora, "Cheesier than me dressed as Indiana Jones?"

Gerald shifted his eyes between the two, "Okay. You're tied."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it. In this case: Mean Girls, Facebook and Taylor Swift.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from **PG-R**. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Pitch Count

**Timeline:** Their first week of living together; takes place before the first drabble.

**Rating:** **PG-13**

**Summary:** Helga's various ringtones confuse Arnold to no end.

**Word Count:** 662

* * *

_"You wanna do something fun? You wanna go to Taco Bell?"_

Arnold turned around slowly in his chair, "_Uh_, what was that?"

"_That_," Helga said as she picked up her phone, "was my text message notification."

Arnold blinked, "Why is that you're text message notification?"

Helga merely gave him a blank look, "Why _not_?"

* * *

Arnold was doing his assigned reading from his bed while Helga was downstairs in the shower, when her phone lit up.

_"Stop calling, stop calling, I don't wanna talk anymore!"_ it blared out for the next several moments and Arnold did his best to read through it.

Finally it stopped, but the missed call notification lit up, _"'Why didn't you call me back?' And I was like, 'Why are you so **obsessed** with me?'"_

After that, Arnold shook his head and tried to carry on with his reading. However, moments later, the voicemail notification went off, _"Boo, you whore."_

The football headed teen could only stare at the phone in wide-eyed shock.

* * *

Arnold and Helga were driving back from school, when,_ "That is **so** fetch!"_

The blond jumped a little, "What the heck was _that_ one for?"

Helga glanced over uninterestedly before pulling out her phone, "Oh, that's my Facebook notification."

A moment of silence passed by before Arnold spoke up, "But, what is _fetch_?"

Helga immediately turned to him and responded perkily, "Oh, its like, slang, from England." When all Arnold did was give her a strange look, she sighed and rolled her eyes, "_Ugh_, you don't get it."

"I don't think I **want** to."

* * *

_"I saw your face and wow! Right then I took-"_

"Hey Phoebs…yeah, that sounds good. I'll be over in a bit."

Helga collected her things and offered Arnold a quick goodbye, but he only shook his head.

* * *

"Hey Helga? What were the page numbers for-

_"I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me…but, I can't help it that I'm popular!"_

"Uh, anyways, what are the-

_"I'm sorry that-_

"**Ugh**!" Helga exclaimed as she pressed the ignore button, "Okay, there. Now, what is it you want?"

"Just the…okay, what ringtone was that for _this_ time?"

Helga sniffed, "Oh, it was only Rhonda. She's been bugging me too much lately."

"Oh, okay then." Arnold cleared his throat, "Right, so what are the page-

_"Boo, you whore."_

"You know what? Nevermind."

* * *

"_So_…"

Helga glanced up from her math homework. When Arnold didn't continue, she raised a brow, "_What_, Football Head?"

The teen tried to look casual, but failed, "What is with all those ringtones?"

Helga blinked, "What."

"I mean, why do you have so many? And what do they even mean?"

Helga sighed, "Look, they're just funny to me and they let me know who is calling or whatever. That way, I don't need to rush to find my phone, only for it to be someone I don't wanna talk to. That sort of thing."

"Oh…does everyone have their own ring tone?"

"Mmm, no, just a few. Like people who call me or who I would call fairly regularly."

"Does that mean I have one?"

Helga visibly froze, "_What_? No, of _course_ not. I live with you."

"But, you gave me one for you."

"Well, **yeah** but that's _different_!"

"How?"

"Cause it _is_, Arnold-o! Now, leave me alone, I've got math to do."

"Sorry."

The tenseness faded from the room, however a moment later Helga's phone blared loudly:

_"And I said, Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone…"_

Helga snatched up her phone on the bed, quickly silencing it before whipping around to face Arnold. He sat in stunned silence, but sure enough an almost smug look developed on his face.

He raised an eyebrow teasingly, "A Taylor Swift song? Gosh, Helga I'm flattered."

"Oh, _save_ _it_ you little smart ass. That's only yours because we were in the play together and they don't exactly have too many songs about football."

"Whatever you say, Helga. Whatever you say."


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from **PG-R**. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Pow-Wow

**Timeline:** Some time during Helga's fifth or sixth month of pregnancy.

**Rating:** **R**. As in: **R**estricted with a big, capital _**R**_. This ain't for children, folks.

**Summary:** Helga can't wait til after school for sexual release; Arnold doesn't put up _too_ much of a fight.

**Word Count:** 816

* * *

"Um, Arnold?" Phoebe tapped the teen on the shoulder.

The blonde turned and looked down, "Yeah, Phoebe?"

"Helga said she needed to see you in her office, _immediately_."

"What did ya do _now_, man?" Gerald asked.

Arnold shrugged, "I don't know, but with her it could be _anything_. Don't wait up for me."

"Alright, man! Good luck!"

Arnold made his way down the hall and approached the door to the abandoned janitor's closet. Just as he was about to reach for the door knob, the door swung open and he was pulled inside. A second later, he was slammed against the door, shutting it soundly. He was instantly enveloped in the familiar embrace of Helga Pataki, and his mouth was being all but devoured by hers. His response was immediate, and he could feel the want rolling off of her in waves.

Pulling back mostly out of surprise, Arnold breathed, "_This_ was why you needed to see me?"

Helga shot him an indignant look, "You make it sound like this is not important."

She was quickly all over him again, nipping at his jaw and sucking on his pulse point and he fought to be coherent, "No, its just…we're at _school_!"

Helga grabbed his hand and shoved it where her thighs met, "Does this feel like I can wait two and a half more **hours**, _Football_ _Head_?"

Having gone completely brain dead, Arnold was helpless to keep her from pulling him toward her desk, all the while aware of the sounds she was making and that he had yet to remove his hand.

Going with what was becoming a familiar practice, Arnold slipped past her panties and into the wet heat. He had only managed to slip one finger inside when he felt her clamp around the digit tightly and her entire body shudder as she did her best to be quiet.

Arnold stared at her in disbelief as she sagged against both him and the desk, "Did…did you just…"

"…_uh-huh_."

"Should…I continue?"

"_Please_," Helga replied breathlessly as she pulled herself against him and captured his lips once more. Arnold moved his hands to brace against the desk until he heard it creak. When he pulled away, Helga pouted, "_Hey_, we're not done yet."

"_Uh_…" Arnold glanced back at the desk and then her, "Its just…I don't have much faith in this desk to hold us both up and not to mention the fact that your baby bump is big enough that I _really_ shouldn't be on top anyway," he glanced down, "And I don't really recommend the floor. Who _knows_ when this was cleaned-

"_Okay_!" Helga waved her hands up dismissively, "Simple solution," and with that she turned around and rested her forearms on the desk.

Arnold stood there with his mouth agape for several moments before finally managing to choke out, "You, you want me to _just_," he gestured to her position.

"Hey, you gotta do what ya gotta do, _Hair_ _Boy_. Now, don't keep me waiting!"

Arnold shrugged his shoulders in a '_what the hey?_' gesture, and went to unbuckle his pants.

"_Wait_!" Helga said as she stood up straight.

Arnold flopped his arms, "You **just** said-

Helga went to her bag the was on the floor and pulled something out, "Here."

Arnold looked at the condom she had placed in his palm before looking back at Helga, "_Um_, is Pregnancy Brain at it again, Helga?"

She rolled her eyes, "It just makes things less messy, alright? Now strap it on, Arnold! We can still have enough time to eat lunch."

"Where did you even _get_ this-

"Questions _later_, Football Head!"

Beyond finding anything in this situation bizarre anymore, Arnold rolled the condom on and placed himself behind her. As he entered her, she made a mewl of pleasure, "_Shh_, Helga. Someone…_ah_, someone might hear us," Arnold managed to whisper as he slid in all the way. He could feel Helga holding back her moans, and he had only pumped four times before he felt her walls close tight around him and her hips bucking against him. Although she had been biting her lips shut, a strangled moan managed to escape through them as she rode out the orgasm. Arnold thrust into her a few more times before he felt his climax rip through him.

Arnold pulled off the condom and pulled his pants back up before lowering himself down on the ground to catch his breath. Helga righted herself a little before kneeling beside him, "Lookit you, Arnold Shortman. Knocking a girl up…doing the deed in the school's janitor closet. _Doggy_ _style_, no less. What's happening to you?"

Arnold gave a breathy chuckle, "You know, there's _one_ common factor in all of those things. That would be _your_ bad influence, Helga Pataki."

Helga gave him a wink before standing up, "You get your breath back, _Fido_. I'll see you in a bit."


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from PG-R. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Cock-shot

**Timeline:** Sometimes later in the 2nd Trimester.

**Rating:** _PG-13_

**Summary:** Discussing why sex won't hurt the baby later in the 2nd trimester. _Drabble_.

**Word Count:** 357

* * *

"Okay, I'm _really_ not sure about this Helga."

"**Ugh**, _why_!?"

Arnold laid back on the mattress and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, "Look, its just…_weird_! Before, it wasn't so bad because you weren't even showing so I could kind of…I don't know, _forget_ about it while we were, uh…_you_ _know_-

"So, now I'm too _fat_ for you to have sex with?" Helga spat as she placed her hands on her hips.

"_**No**_!" Arnold blurted, his hands going to her shoulders as he sat himself back up, "Helga, you're not fat, you're pregnant. I still think you're attractive, its just…" Arnold gestured to the bump between them, "I can now _feel_ the baby and _see_ him moving around in there and its just…strange! Like, what if he can _feel_ what's going on?"

"Well he can, but-

"_See_! That's weird! Is that…do you not find that a little weird? Like, when you…you know, finish…_gah_, **no** this is just too awkward!"

"Arnold!" Helga held his face and looked him straight in the eye, "This is perfectly normal. So, since its _normal_, that means everyone probably does it. Which means your _parents_ probably did it. And you're just fine, right? No emotional or mental scarring from your womb days, right?"

Arnold blinked, "Well, _now_ I might."

Helga rolled her eyes and dropped her hands, "Its really not that big of a deal."

"But, what if we somehow hurt him? I mean, he's getting bigger everyday now and taking up more space; what if **I** hurt him?"

Helga softened her gaze a little and shifted a little where she sat on his lap, "Arnold, we're doing everything the doctor says. I promise that as long as we do that, our baby will be just fine."

Arnold sighed, "Yeah?"

Helga nodded, "And besides, what you have ain't long enough to hurt him anyway."

Arnold fell back on the mattress, "You know what? I'm suddenly not in the mood anymore."


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from PG-R. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Player to be Named Later

**Timeline:** Shortly after Christmas.

**Rating:** **PG**

**Summary:** Baby shower gift from Gerald. _Drabble_.

**Word Count:** 159

* * *

"Hey guys! I got you something!" Gerald exclaimed as he held up the blue gift bag, "_Eh_, consider it a late Christmas present, but I just couldn't resist after I heard you were having a boy."

Gerald had pulled Arnold's computer chair over and sat down as the two pulled tissue paper from the bag. Helga pulled out the baseball uniform one piece. It read 'All Star' on the front, and had a '1' on the back.

Arnold read the print above the number, "'Player to be named later,' humph, yeah _I'll_ say."

"Oh put a sock in it, _Football_ _Head_," Helga snapped, and then turned her attention over to Gerald, "And thanks, Tall Hair Boy. This is really cute."

"Merry Christmas guys, and congratulations. Especially to _you_, Arnold."

Arnold raised a brow, "Why to me?"

"One, you're name will continue on and all that jazz…and two, you won't be outnumbered."

"_Aaand_, that's your queue to get out, _Gerald-o_."


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from PG-R. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Attack the Strike Zone

**Timeline:** Sometime in February.

**Rating:** **PG-13**

**Summary:** Health Class. Arnold loses his cool when the teacher's attitude towards Helga proves to be too much. _Oneshot_.

**Word Count:** 922

* * *

"Alright class, now that's enough!" Miss Bertrand snapped, quieting the snickers across the room, "The topic of safe sex is _certainly_ no laughing matter."

The teacher gave a pointed look towards Helga, who merely rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her baby bump.

Arnold balled his hand tightly around his pencil. And he thought their first period class was rough. He noticed many of the other students take turns glancing at Helga as well, and he heard Sid lean over and whisper something to Stinky and Harold.

He felt his patience drop considerably. He had no idea health class would be _this_ awful. They had made it through the first month of the year without much incident, but he had been dreading this topic for _weeks_. He could have gotten excused from this portion of the class; all he needed was his parents signature, but then Helga would be left high and dry. She was _technically_ still under legal guardianship of her parents. Big Bob never _actually_ disowned her officially, but that also meant she required her parents signature to get out of this class. She said, in not so many words, that that would probably never happen.

And Arnold wasn't about to abandon her either. So, here they both were: him squirming tensely in his chair, and she sitting with an uninterested look on her face as the teacher started in on her lecture.

Arnold managed to take some notes on STDs and AIDs, but before he knew it…

"Now, before we start in on the topic of pregnancy, I'm required to hand these out. This is an attempt by public schools to help keep unwanted teen pregnancies down," she pulled out a container of individually wrapped condoms and started walking around the classroom.

"Too bad you didn't have one of these here rubbers handy, huh Arnold?" Stinky drawled as he wagged a condom towards him.

"Yeah, grab some while you can _Arnold_. You probably need them more than we do!" Harold jeered.

"_Ha_! Good one!" Sid laughed.

Arnold balled his fist tighter, but he kept his face forward. The teacher came round to Helga's aisle and piqued a brow, "If only you had perhaps taken this course _last_ semester, _hmm_ Miss Pataki?"

The blond feigned a cheery smile, "Yeah, 'if only'.

Arnold's face dropped into an appalled expression. Miss Bertrand had approached where he sat with her container, and Harold piped up again, "I say its only fair _Arnold_ gets the rest!"

The blond teen shook his head and looked directly up at the teacher accusingly before sneering over at Harold, "You know what? I don't _need_ any," he stood up and pointed at the large football player, "And you know why? Because Helga is already _pregnant_, and she can't get _anymore_ pregnant. _So_, I get to have all the **unprotected** sex I _want_!" Harold's and the rest of the classes mouths dropped wide open in shock. Arnold looked around the room and nodded, "Yep, that's right. So its **you** guys that need these more than me. _Oh_, except for the fact that all your girlfriends are too scared of getting pregnant themselves. So, go ahead and fill your pockets with condoms for all that safe sex you won't be having, and I'll happily take credit for that by the way," he smirked with no real humor and leaned over his desk, "_Me_, on the other hand? Yeah, I'm getting some just about everyday. But, please…_keep_ making jokes about how **I** have it rough right now."

"_Mr_. _Shortman_, that's _quite_ enough-

"Oh!" he whirled around to face the teacher, "Don't worry, Miss Bertrand. I'm done talking to _them_. But you? You're a teacher! Your first job is to, well…teach, but your second job is to be unbiased," Arnold said firmly, "And the way you're treating Helga is just completely _unfair_ and inappropriate. And you know what? She shouldn't have to put up with that from a teacher. And I'm not going to either," he finished matter-of-factly before bending down to collect his things.

Helga, who finally seemed to snap out of her daze, jerked in her chair, "_Whoa_, are we ditching class?"

Arnold gave a shrug as he lifted up his backpack, "Looks like it."

"_Sounds_ good to me!" She chirped as she grabbed her things, got up and headed for the door.

"_You two can't just-_

"We'll save you the effort and head to the principal's office ourselves," Arnold tossed over his shoulder before swinging the door shut behind him.

* * *

They had rounded a corner before Helga spun around, "_Whoo_, that was _some_ speech there Football Head."

"Feeling ready to pound me within an inch of my life yet?" Arnold muttered as he rubbed the back of his neck.

The girl shrugged, "Nothing you said was a _lie_, and besides…everyone knows we've done it at least _once_," she poked at his chest teasingly, "_Plus_ the look on Harold's face was _priceless_!"

They continued their walk and Arnold peered curiously at her, "_So_, you're not mad then?"

"I mean, if you had been defending my _honor_ or whatever the whole time? Yeah, that would've pissed me off. But, really you were kind of just standing up for yourself. Ain't nothing wrong with that."

"Yeah, but the whole school is going to know…that we-

"What? Bone like wild animals?"

"_Helga_-

"What! You're going to be a parent before you're 18! At least you're getting _laid_."

Arnold laughed and shook his head, "Whatever you say, Helga. Whatever you say."


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Hey Arnold! Or anything else that probably sounds like you could make some money off of it.

This will be a short collection of drabbles and/or oneshots that are directly related to my story Dropped the Ball. They are best described as 'deleted scenes'; ideas and moments that I enjoyed the thought of, but felt did not fit well in any of my chapters. I'm also hoping these will suffice when the juices aren't flowing to crank out any new chapters.

There will be nine chapters, with ratings varying from PG-R. The rating, as well as a brief description and time at which it takes places, will be at the beginning of every chapter.

Enjoy this final installment! Hope you guys enjoyed these.

* * *

**Chapter Title:** Knee-Buckler

**Timeline:** Valentine's Day

**Rating:** PG

**Summary:** Arnold manages to make Helga feel really flattered. _Drabble_.

**Word Count:** 202

* * *

"_Um_, hey Helga," Arnold said nervously as he entered into their room. Helga was sitting at the desk with her back to him. When all she did was grunt in response, Arnold approached the desk, "_Uh_, Happy Valentine's Day?"

Helga whipped around with an expression of confusion, but that quickly morphed into one of shock when she saw the bouquet of daisies being held out to her, "Wha…wait, _huh_?"

A light blush was staining Arnold's cheeks as he cleared his throat, "It's Valentine's Day, and…_well_ I figured since you're carrying my unborn son, I thought I'd buy you some flowers. You know, pretty flowers for a pretty girl and all that?"

Helga blinked as she took the happy looking flowers. Glancing tentatively up at him she asked, "You…you think I'm pretty?"

Arnold looked caught off guard for a moment before giving her a genuine smile, "Yes, Helga. I think you're pretty. _Really_ pretty."

Helga blushed as she tried to casually shrug it off as she turned back around, "Yeah, well since its _Valentine's Day_ and all, I _guess_ I'll let all this _sappiness_ slide. But don't go making a habit of it, _Hair_ _Boy_."

Arnold was smiling as he rolled his eyes.


End file.
